The Terrence Incident

Prior to the cook that I worked with that needed time off in the middle of the shift in order to consummate a drug deal, the worst example of employer/employee relations I had witnessed was:

The Terrence Incident.

Terrence is just one of those guys. You know the guy. He's cool, savvy, and everybody's friend. Now, let me be clear, I like the guy. We liked the same music, had some good talks during our shifts, and generally got on really well. However, Terrence was not very cognizant of time. Especially when that time related to the time he was supposed to come in. During one of my first shifts, I was supposed to come in on a Tuesday night after my day job. So I dutifully show up at 6, only to find Terrence is not there and the day shift cook is pissed as he needs to get out. He doesn't want to leave me alone, because I didn't know the whole menu at that point. So we call Terrence.

Oh, he's coming in, he's going to be a bit late, the bartender tells us. He was due in at five. It's now 6:20. Like I said, Terrence operated on a different clock from the rest of us.

Anyway, he shows up, finally, and his excuse was he hurt his knee while working out. Did he go to the doctor? Not exactly. He went to his 'Dr. Feelgood.' His words. My manager shows up, and reads him the riot act while I'm in the kitchen. Is there anything more uncomfortable than being in the same room as someone who is getting yelled at? Yeah, not fun.

So the manager basically says that you need to give notice if you're going to be late. Common courtesy, etc. etc.

The next day Terrence decides to show up an hour and a half late to his next shift. He gets fired.

Now, as I said, we all liked Terrence on a personal level. So he would come to the bar every so often to hang out. There were no hard feelings. Terrence was one of those guys that could probably walk in on his girlfriend getting gang banged by the Knicks and he would shut the door and never give it another thought.

So Terrence is in late one night, after the bar has closed. I didn't witness this first hand, but heard from the main participants who all related the story to me the same way.

The bartender is there, a waitress, a cook, and Terrence. A word about Jim, the cook. I love Jim. He's funny as hell. But, the down side is he tends to like to drink during his shift. I'm certainly not one to think negatively about someone for that, I merely offer this as background. So by 2 a.m., Jim's pretty well hammered, given the fact that he was done his shift at 1.

Jim's in the bathroom, which is downstairs. He hears some noises coming out of the walk in refrigerator where all the food is kept. As he comes out of the bathroom, Jim bumps into Terrence. He tells Terrence he doesn't work there anymore and he can't go into the employee area. So that was it.

Fast forward a half hour and Jim's bothered by something. He notices that Terrence's coat pockets are bulging. Even in his inebriated condition, Jim knows something's up. So he goes over and looks in the pocket. On the top of the pocket, there's a hamburger. Raw, wrapped up and prepped for when we use it on the line. So Jim pulls it out. Under it is a chicken wing and thigh. And some ham. And some cheese. He empties both the pockets.

Terrence apparently thought it was ok to do his grocery shopping in the walk-in.

Jim says 'Seriously?' And starts laughing.

The bartender can't stop laughing. Well, right up to the point where it came time to pay the tab, of around $40, and Terrence tells him he only has $2. Not so funny after that.

So Terrence gets banned. A few weeks later, he bumps into the owner. He makes good on the check. When the owner asks him 'why the fuck would you steal from me?' Terrence replies brilliantly:

"I'm not the worst one there."

For some reason, his ban remains in place.

Oh, and did I mention? He lives at home with his parents. He didn't need the food.